Marriage hasn’t stopped him from sleeping around

Dear Bunmi,
My husband gets a load of kicks from flirting with other
women. For the eight years we’ve been married, I’ve
watched him chat up women and had countless nights
anxiously waiting for him to come home from his night-
crawling. Now, after his last affair where his latest
girlfriend insulted me to my face in his presence, I’ve
decided I can no longer live with him.

love

Dear Bunmi,

My husband gets a load of kicks from flirting with other

women. For the eight years we’ve been married, I’ve

watched him chat up women and had countless nights

anxiously waiting for him to come home from his night-

crawling. Now, after his last affair where his latest

girlfriend insulted me to my face in his presence, I’ve

decided I can no longer live with him.

When I told him I wanted to quit the marriage, he said

that suited him fine as he was thinking of going abroad to

work. This would mean our two children might not even

see him. It’s hell being with a man who can’t stay faithful,

but if I end our marriage, my children will lose their father.

What should I do?

BiIikis, by e-mail

Dear Bilikis,

Being married to a casanova can be a nightmare. Flirting

might be harmless, but it led him to having affairs while

controlling you and does what he likes. Now that you’ve

found the strength to fight back, he’s making you feel

guilty for the hurt your children may feel at the

separation. As a mother, you naturally want them to have

contact with their father, but you can’t make your

husband a responsible father. He has shown little respect

for you and your marriage.

You deserve better, and if he’s unwilling to change, then

you are right to end the relationship. While your children

need a father, they also deserve a happy mum. Perhaps

your threat to end the marriage has made him invent his

job abroad so you’ll change your mind. Let him know that